We see it all the time on our social media pages. People doing things they shouldn’t. Flirting, leaving inappropriate comments and heading into dangerous waters. I hide out in dirty public restrooms during our band Goldy lockS’ breaks catching up on my vocal rest. Many times there is no dressing room. So the stalls are where I find my refuge.
I sit on the toilet and look at the vomit, toilet paper on the floors, and misplaced tampons to name a few filthy things. But what hurts my heart the most is the vocal regurgitation I’m subjected to listen to night after night.
About 70% of the dumb drunk b!tches are talking about cheating on their husbands, boyfriends and partners. How they are really “pulling on over” and how they will never know. It actually hurts me to hear this… it takes a toll.
As a woman, I’m prone to say, “All men…” It’s not. It’s both. Many people are unhappy. Many people are miserable and many have no clue how to communicate or fix things.
I was coming home from a horrific trip and on an international flight. The hell I’d been through in Afghanistan is a whole nether blog. I’d never even tell the details of that shit storm. No one could handle it and I’d make too many people look worse than they already do themselves.
To start the trip out, a band mate partied too much the night before and ended up in the hospital. He was fine, but when all was said and done, he couldn’t travel. And it left me with a big frickin mess. I needed someone with a passport and all their papers in line. Ugh. If I didn’t find someone, I’m out a lot of money.
Which I would be anyway on this trip. The people I hired, with exception of one, our soundman God love him, learned the songs on the way over to fill the void. The douche bags I was with caused me hell & problems. We got shot at; I almost missed 2 major flights while there due to their debauchery… I was a mess.
On my trip home, I was filled with memories of the greatest men and women I’d ever met. I’d do that trip again in a heartbeat. Asshole travel companions and all. But I was beat to hell. Just beat.
A man sat next to me on an all day & night flight home from somewhere. I forget where. Well dressed, well spoken, educated. He was a scientist from Germany. And about the best listener I’ve ever met. He wasn’t a creep and didn’t make me feel like I needed a shower sitting next to him.
We talked the flight away and he ended up a Facebook friend on one of my pages. He was one of the first to support my Goodnight video project. He comments on my posts in a dry foreign humor that is delightful. There still are some great people out there. And I relish in it.
Something changed though. I saw he met a “lady friend.” She was beautiful, stunning and had impeccable taste. She suddenly graced his page everyday. And I had to smile. He was joyous and happy. As we should be.
This woman became his wife. And I had front row social media seats. I see his posts now. Stronger and more complimentary than ever of his new bride. He just beams. He brags and dotes and it’s one of the most beautiful “affairs” I’ve ever seen. It’s out there people. Wait for it, renew it, get it back or work on what you have. You deserve happiness.
Another place I frequent is Louisville KY. The Phoenix Hill Tavern where this incredibly beautiful, perfect looking couple makes you want to vomit every time you see them! Ha ha! This whole family would make you sick! This man knows how to have an AFFAIR with his wife every time I see him!
He is ALL ABOUT HER! And it just cuts through and shows. I asked her where she got her outfit. She glowed as she told me her husband of how many years? Picked it out and bought it for her.
I brought this woman on stage for our out of control rendition of “Crazy Bitch” and I had to yell on the mic to her husband… “Get a room”. He was at the edge of the stage and his eyes were ALL on her. Again, it filled me with joy. Because I got to actually SEE what it is I’ve been holding out for all these years. It is possible.
The third “Affair” I will refer to is another couple I’ve only met twice, but they came both nights our last visit to Evansville. Dan & Shelley. Two BEAUTIFUL people who took the time to tell me how they keep it together. Dan basically just told me
You can have any ass in the room. But when you’re done? What do you have?”
He explained he and Shelly were the best of friends. Don’t get him wrong, they still do it like rabbits, but when they’re done they have to “go out to the yard and get stuff done!”
I loved that line. And I love them. Three couples who are obviously having an “affair” with each other. And two of these couples we are talking over 20 years or more of marriage.
If you are reading this and your relationship could use a little help, or even a lot. Go talk to someone. There are counselors out there who this is their job and they can help you. There are priests, ministers and clergy who are trained to lend an ear. There are people who care. Go do it. Use these couples as an example that you too can have it all.
If you are single, haven’t met the right person yet, don’t worry. They are out there for you. They say when you least expect it… they will be there! Well, I believe that. But I also believe you can’t win the lottery if you don’t buy at least ONE ticket! So get online. There are wonderful websites out there to meet people. Why not try?
To quote my own damn song, “Today I Won’t Be Afraid”… “Better to have lived and given second chances, than to have lived and never loved at all…”
Get out there! But don’t settle. Find the right person deserving of the time and effort that goes into a great relationship. Find someone who deserves YOU!
This blog is a tribute to the people I meet on the road who inspire and fulfill me. You remind me and others that love takes time and work, but it’s out there. You’re living proof.
May the road rise up to meet you. May the wind always be at your back.
May the sun shine warm upon your face, and rains fall soft upon your fields.
And until we meet again, May God hold you in the palm of His hand.
I love you all. Goldy