Wednesday, July 23, 2014

What’s the hardest thing you’ve ever had to do? A Tribute

What’s the hardest thing you’ve ever had to do? 
Ask yourself. How did you get through it?

Well the toughest thing I needed to do so far in my life, happened a year ago today. Ironically ONE kind word, posted on the following link reminded me what today was.

I had promised a year in advance. Not knowing what it would in tale or how difficult it would be. I did ok on the actual “day” the deed went down, until so many people would come up to me crying. It through me off. I know I came across as a cold heartless bitch. And I didn’t care. I had a job to do.

The “help” I was supposed to get that day didn’t come. The person bagged out and once again, “flying solo” was I. I went to the back of the venue, took off my damn shoes and listened to a note I had sung into the voice recorder on my phone earlier that morning. I shook. Even with my shoes off. I was drenched and scared.

I stood in a corner nursing my little note. I was trying to remember what key to sing this damn song in. Someone came up behind me and put their hand on my back. I flipped out. I know I motioned them to just back the hell away. Couldn’t they see I was “busy” for the love of God? I still to this day don’t know who it was, but I’m not sorry. I was more focused than I had ever been.

I shook, I trembled as I walked down what seemed a never-ending isle. I know all eyes were on me, but mine were focused on what lay ahead of me.

Remember when you make a promise, keep it. DO your best to keep your word. Sometimes circumstances change or people do, but always try. And if things get too hard to bear, just do what I do. Some of you see me do it every week. Just take your shoes off. Kick up your heels and do the best job you can.

I love you still mom. More than ever. What an example of an exquisite human being you made. Happy Death Day. The Anniversary of when you were made whole again, reunited with your family and friends, all the angels in Heaven and God The Almighty Father.

Me & mom! 

Me & My mom... some 30 years later. :-) Same Place.
She died the following week. 
You never know when it will be the last one!

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